A Source of Comfort...

U Rock my World
U are the twinkle in my eye
U make my heart skip a beat
U are the one I've always wished for
U are charming
U are my crush
U are my everything
U bring joy to my life
U make me laugh
U are the one for me
U inspire me
U motivate me
U are my treasure
U mean the world to me
U are my dream come true
&
I'm thankful for U
I'm passionate about U
I value U
I respect U
I love being around U
I yearn for U
& most of all
I LOVE YOU!
{My 1st & Only True Love}
Take me, I'm all Urs...
'cos U had me from HELLO!

No Greater Honor...

My Little Indian has paid me tribute for inducting him into the world of Harry Potter on his blog. Well... he did on the comments page so I am reproducing his words here...

...and just in case anyone was wondering... If Hogwarts was a real place, Amit would definitely be a Ravenclaw! Heck! He would go on to become Head of Ravenclaw house! Even if he screamed and begged the Sorting hat to put him in Gryffindor... it still wouldnt happen!

Accept it dude... You are high on brains, but brawn isnt your scene. Haha!


Amit Desai said...
I am eternally grateful to Oladi popo Adebola who in June 2005 introduced me to Harry's world. I felt exactly like Voldemort - Harry connection both having this significant link ; Voldemort being ofcourse Ladi :)

Thou shall always be thanked for this!

In Search of a Good Conversation

I miss Isaac Okanlawon.

And He’s not the only one I miss.

I miss Ejiro Otiotio, Emma Gavert, Bros Solay, Maria Johansson and Tobi Odunowo. I miss Osibo Imhoitsike, Segun Sangowawa, Amit Desai and Oh. My. God. I MISS Labake Quadri. Of course I miss a WHOLE lot more people than these ones above. (I miss Tope so much its almost a physical pain sometimes!) And I miss them all for various different reasons! But the people above, all have two things in common.

1) – they all live in the northern hemisphere
2) – I had some bloody good conversations with each and every one of them!!!

Topics were as varied as the individuals themselves:

- I spoke about Love, Life and what a Swedish girl REALLY wants in a man with Maria
- Issues of politics, philosophy and what it takes to develop a nation like Nigeria with Isaac
- I was driven almost to the point of insanity by Kene with discussions on religion and belief systems
- Emma Gavert challenged my views on homosexuality and its taboo status in African culture versus its acceptance in Western civilization
- I counselled and shared Segun’s pain on relationship issues
- Osibo and I tried to prove to one another why our respective English Premiership sides were the best in the world
- I debated and regularly almost came to blows with Bros Solay on the state of the Nigerian nation and who was really to blame for the rot there.
- Almost any discussion and/or situation with Labake Quadri turned into a heated argument on pros and cons
- Amit and I went through the finer details of the Harry Potter series trying to decide if Harry was or was not a Hocrux…

…and so on and so forth

The closest thing I have to a good conversationist (sic) is my darling flatmate Mialy, who is from Madagascar and has very strong views on the death penalty and its abject failure in curbing serious crime.
And of course there is Sean my best friend here in New Zealand who I went to high school with in Nigeria. It's always interesting to hear his views on 'proper' behaviour for young girls and I know he is ALWAYS there for me to 'shoot the breeze' with.

So from being surrounded by all these damn good debaters and logical thinkers who are passionate about one thing or the other. I have been left with a couple of shining stars in Mialy and Sean.

Of course I never realized how much I cherished and enjoyed these conversations until I got here to New Zealand . Now don’t get me wrong when I say this. NZ is full of some pretty smart dudes and dudettes. The kiwis I have met and interacted with are hardy, friendly outgoing people. You are much more likely to get an invitation for a drink (or “piss-up” as it is more colourfully known) here in Auckland , after work than you would in Stockholm . But being so far away from EVERYWHERE seems to have its pros and cons.

Pros – You don’t have to worry about some rogue terrorist group targeting strategic locations in Auckland or Wellington . Its just too far away from the action.
Cons – Your distance from everything and everyone else makes you get into a “What’s-happening-in-the-world-not-that-I-really-care“ mode.

There is a serious dearth of good conversations in Auckland . At least available to me.

Anyone who knows me will know that I thrive in front of an audience. Of one or one hundred, it really doesn’t matter. I am so people-oriented that magical experiences that I go through alone hold no special meaning for me. There needs to be at least one other person there to laugh with and share the memories with. I was barely 20 years old when I decided that even girls that shared my bed, in addition to being physically alluring had to be intellectually stimulating. I have had some amazing “pillow talk” in my time I can tell you!

Now I am able to admit that a lot of those conversations fed my enormous ego and left me feeling that I could hold my own with some of the smartest people I have had the pleasure of meeting. (Kenechukwu Umeasiegbu as a case in point). But I ALWAYS increased my knowledge and answers gained led to even more stimulating questions.

Thank goodness for email, phone, skype and all the other inventions by man that has turned the world into a Global Village. The last time I spoke to Isaac on the phone was last week from his base in Amsterdam. We spoke for 35 minutes. And he was just calling to say a quick hi!

So this is what I have concluded. I have to go out more. Expand my social circle and meet some more interesting people in Auckland. Perhaps I should try and start a conversation with those I know already, a conversation that goes beyond Rugby and what the weather will look like today in Auckland. J

I will admit, being a sucker for a pretty face (among other assets) has distracted me in the past from recognising a good candidate for a good conversation. But that distraction is no longer there (or has being effectively muted) by Tope. So the next time I go to that nice Italian wine bar on High Street, I will have my priorities straight.

Providence send me more kindred spirits who recognises the importance of a bottle (or two or three) some cheese, and a never ending list of topics to get passionate about!

And so ends an epic!

The time is 01.05am NZT. (14.05 GMT)

I am very very impressed with the seventh Harry Potter book.

Considering all the hype and marketing blitz that preceeded the book, it had huge and massive expectations on its head!

And it delivered on every single one.

I laughed, I cried, I got goosebumps, I squealed in delight, I read the book in just over seven hours. 4 hours straight at first and then I had to attend an obligatory birthday party where I moped by myself in a corner and drank a whole bottle of wine. All the while with a clear sense of expectation and impatience to get back to my book.

Now it's done. The story has ended in a very typical and traditional sense. No unexpected and bold twist to the end, although there are plenty of twists and turns to delight the conspiracy theorists. But Oh my Goodness!!! The ride to that end was a roller coaster!

I am obviously trying not to give away anything of importance here, for those of you who havent gotten a hand on a copy and intend to. I will stop here before I do.

And so ends Harry Potter. Or is it a beginning? Kids will ALWAYS be turning eight years old. You can be sure that in the same way Charles Dickens, C.S Lewis, Roald Dahl etc are still being read many many years after their deaths. The bank account (and then her estate -damn her lucky kids!) of Joanne Rowling will be receiving a cheque in the mail for a very LOOOOOOONG time.

Let me see what the world is saying about the book... I think I'll start by reading that New York Times review...

Beginning of the End...

I left home at 11.20am NZT. (00.20GMT)

I joined the queue in the bookstore at 11.28am NZT.

I was on the queue for 12 minutes

I had the book in my hands at 11.40am NZT

I got home at 12noon NZT. (3 mins ago)

I will not be available for the next few hours!

Off to see what happens to Harry...

Cheerio!

Much Ado about a beard

Rugby is the national sport of New Zealand.

As well it should be. They seem to be the damn best at it. It happens to be about the only sport in which they regularly spank the Wallabies (thats the Australian Rugby Union team for the uninitiated) and for a "little brother" nation constantly in the shadow of their bigger regional brother... well lets just say you dont want to be seen in a yellow and green jersey when the All Blacks lose to the Wallabies! As was the case a couple of weeks ago!

To be honest, not a lot of countries (compared to say Football) have Rugby as their national sport. The traditional power houses of Rugby are:

- New Zealand "All Blacks"

- Australian "Wallabies"

- South African "Springboks"

And then we have France, England, Ireland, Wales etc... and obviously, Rugby Union is not the number one national sport in these countries.

And therein lies the rub!

New Zealand have not won the Rugby world cup since 1987. The All Blacks won the inaugural edition in 1987 and have not won it since. England and France have won once and Australia has won twice!!! In between world-cups the All blacks dominate and beat every one silly (literally and figuratively) but somehow have not managed to repeat the success of that first World Cup.

You can imagine this fact grates on the collective psyche of a nation that DOES have Rugby as their NUMERO UNO National Sport!

Which brings us to the issue of Carl Hayman's beard. Carl Hayman plays the prop position in the All Blacks and along with a trio of other players forms the main fulcrum of the team. He had a shaggy appearance (pic above) sometime ago and the All Blacks co-incidentally (or not?) had one of their most convincing runs in a long time. They vanquished all in their path.

Now the next Rugby World Cup is coming up in Sept/Oct and the All Blacks like in previous editions have been really dominating leading up to the competition.

So a group has sprung up here totally determined to get Carl to go back to his shaggy man persona and ensure the All Blacks triumph at the World Cup hosted by France!

The group is SO serious that they are asking all "...Kiwis everywhere throw down their razors and present a united, hairy front to the world..." And according to a radio report I heard this morning, they are asking not only the men - but also the WOMEN - who can grow beards to join in as well.

Stranger things have been seen in the world of sport!

Apparently I am a Good Dancer

Of course it was never in any doubt!

I mean... it wasnt for nothing that I won the "best dance move" award at the Fonterra Xmas Party last year was it?

But on that occassion, I was reliving the moves and trickery of the one-time "King of Pop" to the adoration of the mostly kiwi dominated Fonterra staff audience.

The setting was slightly different here.

It was the celebration of the Colombian National Day and the venue was the classy Ellersille Center a few klicks from central city Auckland. There was some 800 people... latin people... there. The hall was grandly decorated and needless to say, I didnt notice any of the decorations because of the drop dead gorgeous Latin women all over the place. Dark haired, smouldering eyes, laviscious curves and almost every single one of them had a wedding band on her finger!

Since the promise of so much latin beauty on display had lured me to the event in the first place, I contented myself with just admiring glances and started mental exercises to determine how the gorgeous women managed to remain in such great shape after 2 or 3 kids. Perhaps having to balance one of said kids on her hip whilst dragging the other one by the hand 6 days a week ha something to do with. The fact that their beauty paled in comparison to Tope's own also helped quite a lot!

After a very varied and wonderful display of different folk dances by different age groups, and gouging myself on the Chili Kankani(sic) and rice and drinking a couple of glasses of very good red wine... I was certainly in the mood for some gyrations on the dance floor.

The main stage had transformed into one huge dance floor and I had 'cliqued' up with some ex-AIESECers and some colleagues from work. At first we danced in that annoying way which is popular in parties in Europe. That of standing around in a circle and not having a specific partner. But hey! This was a latin party in full swing and THAT didnt last long at all.

There was a live band there which was actually very good and from the crowd's responses, churning out popular hits! I danced Salsa first with a Mexican colleague and she exclaimed, "Oh Ladi... you dance so good!" And here I was just moving to the beat of the song and trying to keep up!

And then there was Karen!

Karen is English, an accountant by day and teacher of dance by night... 5 nights a week at the local salsa dance club. Karen and I first danced to a particularly provocative song which required lots of hips touching, pinpoint accurate sway to the beat of the music and grand flourishes and twirls! Again, I managed to barely keep up and truth to tell, Karen was leading 80% of the time!

But damn, she made me look much better than I really am!

I havent sweated, laughed and danced that much since my brother's wedding! Amy, Ana, Robert, Mauricio, Gerrado, all praised my dancing skills and I just smiled and shrugged as if it was nothing. Like I did it all the time. Yeah Right!

But I guess when it comes right down to it... dance is not about counting your steps and following the rules. It's about being in tandem with the rythmns of the song and letting your body give expression to that rythmn.

Its Friday evening in Auckland now... and I will pop round to the Mexican Cafe a bit later and see if my body cant give expression to some rhythmns!
_____________________________________________________________

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows out tomorrow! I am dead-broke from paying off the last of my travel debts but not so broke I wont be forking out the NZ$23.00 balance for the book at 11am 2moro! I already pre-booked some 5 months ago with NZ$10.00

There's already a review of the book in the NY times. I havent read it. At least not until I finish the book. Jo Rowling railed at the whole lot of them trying to spoil it for us faithful readers and I dont want to partake of any curse she might have placed on those websites.
She's very powerful you know! (whichever way you look at it!)

I Have Done a Terrible Thing...

...Thoughtless, Selfish and Yes it is as bad as you think!

May God forgive me!

How DOES She Do it?!

- July 21, 2007

- Forbes 100 Richest Celebrities on E! Channel

- What I spent my Sunday evening doing

How are the three things above connected?

Well... the picture on the left is a dead give away. They all have to do with the boy wizard who has taken the world (Muggle and non-Muggle worlds alike) by storm!

More importantly, they have to do with the creator of Harry Potter. Madame Rowling. First off, regardless of whatever theory I postulate below, I think she is a real witch. And a powerful one to boot! And who has bewitched us all into buying into a story that is in all likelihood true!

Is it very obvious I am a fan of Harry Potter?

On July 21, 2007 the seventh and final book in the series will be released world-wide and I hear it's already broken all kinds of records already. It will be the culmination of a journey (at least for readers) that started some 10-odd years ago.

Yesterday, I watched the run down of the 100 richest celebrities on the E! Entertainment channel. More than Madonna; more than Martha Stewart; more than Jennifer Lopez, Jennifer Anniston AND Angelina Joline put together and surpassed only by God (otherwise known as Oprah) J.K Rowling is worth US$1 billion, give or take a few million. That is not a lot of money...

...THAT IS AN INSANE AMOUNT OF MONEY!

And all from writing six books? But much more than the money here... how and why have her books captured the imagination so much? According to wikipedia, the books themselves have sold about 325 million copies. Five of the seven books have been turned into blockbuster movies and the attendant merchandising doesnt hurt in the slightest.

I spent my Sunday evening watching the lastest installment of the movie franchise. Like the previous 4 films before it, it only gets a 4/10 from me. Not because it wasnt good but because they left so many cool parts out. A bit harsh but there you go!

Again moving away from the financial aspect of things (its not easy) what would make a children's book so special and compelling as to have adults and children scrambling to get their hands on it? Now this is a fundamental question for me as I hope to someday create a story that will someday be on the shelves of Borders Bookshops. (A million copies is all I ask for)

I think Ms Rowling has taken a highly implausible world and made it shockingly simple to relate to. A world residing behind the normal world we know and employing fantastic means (Magic!!!) to everyday stuff. We know magic doesnt really exist but Oh. My. God. If it did, it would probably be exactly as Jo has described it.

Stupefy, Expecto Patronus, Experlliamus, spells to make you fall in love, transform yourself into some kind of animal, wash the dishes, clean your room, magical creatures at your beck and call, other ones that would sooner swat you aside... and you need to go to this centuries old castle to learn how to control all that magic. Amazing!

I was a (serious) fan of only one other fantasy book series. The Wheel of Time Series by Robert Jordan. He also employs similar tricks used by J.K Rowling. Leaving clues in book 2, the significance of which you wouldnt realize until Book 6. Crafting together scenes and narrative action that make you actually see yourself performing these feats. The main characters have developed a life of their own that makes it impossible for you NOT to care what happens to them!

Fair warning though if you want to look for Robert Jordan... the Wheel of Time stretches across 11 novels and 1 pre-quel and it is STILL NOT done! If you ask me, Jordan has lost the plot! But the first 3... 4... 5 books were so damned good that Jordan decided to make as much money off of us and extend the run until he tied himself into knots. And contracted a rare life-threatening disease on the way! He has promised to complete the story in Book 12 even if it means 2000 pages!

I have also fallen for another series now. The Codex Alera series by Jim Butcher. It is very similar to the Wheel of Time, employing characters that wield enormous magical power through the elements and characters imbued with so much life and reality, they move the story along all by themselves. Jim Butcher goes a step further by constantly making you re-evaluate the intentions and leanings of each character viz-a-viz "which side are you on?'. Someone you would have labelled 'evil' turns out to be good or a 'good' character turns out to have an ugly side to him. Fascinating stuff.

He also promised a trilogy at the beginning but now we are waiting for Book 4!

Anyway... I have pre-ordered my copy of "Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows" and like Pierre, I will also be unavailable right after I pick up my copy. I should be done by Saturday evening. And if you are a fan... dont read the next line... Hermione dies in the seventh book.

Go on then... hate me!

Mulling over Mortality...

A friend of mine died on Sunday.

The finality of the above statement makes goosebumps break out all over my body. Mary Fatima Abu nee Taidi was a friend, big sister, sometime boss and travel companion, lovable personality and now she is gone. Just like that.

I met Mary eight years ago in the ancient city of Kano in northern Nigeria, where she was the President of the local AIESEC chapter. We were there for a conference and we, who hadnt met her had heard stories of the 'Iron Lady' of Kano. The reality turned out to be much more pleasant.

Smart, beautiful, warm and out-going just begin to describe her. She had a sharp tongue and a sharper wit that could be deployed to leave her listeners in gales of laughter or reduce a deliberately obtuse individual to wondering why his/her clothes AND skin were not in tatters on the floor! She never suffered fools gladly but did not deliberately set out to hurt anyone.

The irony is that she was the first to reply to a wedding announcement by a mutual friend on an email list I belong to. This was on Friday. On Sunday she was dead! Expecting her first child; having gotten married last year, I dont want to imagine the pain and grief her husband is going through right now!

A friend wrote this in a tribute to her, "Like every one of us, Mary was in her prime, building a career and a family for herself. Her hopes, aspirations and ambitions could not have been much different from ours, individually and collectively"

The only difference now is that her aspirations have been cut short. It could have been anyone one of us. It could have been me. More than my own near miss incident in December last year, in a way I cannot fully explain, Mary's death has made me more aware of my mortality. It has made me realize that we REALLY NEED to live life to the fullest and do those things that really matter.

From the deluge of memorials, tributes and moving eulogies that Mary's death has invoked literally from all around the world, Mary obviously lived her tragically cut-short life to the fullest!

O Death, Where is Thy Sting? (here in our wrenching hearts, DAMN YOU!)

Sleep Well Mary Fatima Taidi-Abu!

Presenting the New Couple in all their Glory...

Okay Okay Okay... I hope this is not a case of over-kill here.

But I DID travel 30,000 miles for the principal reason of attending this wedding and it was such a wonderful and successful one... can any of you really blame me. Besides this is an opportunity for me to share a bit of my culture with you all.

Presenting the lovely couple... Mr & Mrs Segun and Dupe AJAYI....

With this Ring I Thee Wed... Part II

Where were we now?

Ah yes... the bride's family was receiving the official letter of intent from the groom's family. I have understandably simplified the whole process here. There are countless songs, ceremony and specific forms that go back and forth between the families.

These can be called the preliminaries and depending on how long-winded the family representatives are... can last anywhere between an hour and a half and 3 hours!

Anyway... once intent has been signalled and received, it's time to get the potential suitor himself. All through the prelim activities, the groom is stationed outside and is not allowed in until this point. SO when the bride's family rep calls out, "So where is the young man seeking our daughter's hand in marriage?" (or something to that effect) the drummers, praise singers and young women of his family go and collect him.

Now it is not just a matter of leading him in by the nose, the whole event is taking place in a hall that has a long entrance hall. The bride's family has "sentries" and "toll-collectors" lined all along the route of the entrance hall. And the groom is expected to pay his 'dues' to all the vampires along the route here. This is sometimes in the form of gifts but more usually cash!

Which is why the groom usually assembles a posse behind him for this crucial aspect of the ceremony......now while every "groom's posse" that I have witnessed at wedding ceremonies has tried to intimidate the "toll-collectors and try to get away without paying too much, none of them has been very successful! My brother's wasnt either. We paid through the nose I can tell you!

And it wasnt restricted to the entrance hallway either. When we got to the front where the action was taking place. We found the bride's family representative feigning sleep. And we were informed that only a huge gift would be able to wake her up. Seeing as she was the only one able to introduce the groom to the bride's family, we had to again dispense with cash gifts! The rep tries to draw this out as long as possible in order to get the groom and his posse to drop as much as possible.
When it seemed we had dropped enough to buy a brand new car and she still wasnt 'waking up' one of my brother's friends whispered in my ear that perhaps if one of us delivered a well-placed smack to her face, that would do the trick!!!

Eventually she did 'wake up' and she made the very flowery introductions of the young man who had come seeking the hand of the beautiful damsel. And then we (my brother and his 'posse') were required to greet the elders of the bride's family in the traditional manner. In Yoruba culture, young men greet a much older person by prostrating on the floor... that is...lying on the floor and touching your head to the ground. Age is venerated in Yoruba culture and old age usually equates wisdom. Or at least is supposed to. Women kneel down on both knees.

So we were required to do this three times. Dont ask me why. I just know we had to do it three times...

Here we are preparing to go to ground!

And here we are giving homage to the elders of the bride's family in true Yoruba fashion!

Eventually my brother is left all alone on the floor as he is the principal 'plaintiff'! He is asked a series of trick questions which are all designed to ensure that he is made of the right stuff and will treat his bride with love, honor and respect! As you can see from the pic below, my brother doesnt mind all the questions in the least or even his proximity to the floor. He's going home with a beautiful bride at the end of it afterall!

Eventually the bride's family elders pronounce themselves satisfied and the groom is asked to pose with both sets of parents.

And now it's half-time in the proceedings!

No... No... a break is not given although drinks, refreshments and food will have been flowing all through the assembled guests, family members and friends.

The most important person in all these proceedings is now introduced into the fray. Once the groom has safely gotten approval and gotten all the trick questions correct. The bride's family representative calls out for the young lady in question. And who all the fuss is made about!

The bride is now ushered in as well with the expected fanfare. Drumming, dancing and singing. But with one added twist... she comes in veiled.

Now I am told that if things were being done strictly according to the book (which it wasnt in this case), the bride would come out with a group of other girls all similarly veiled and the prospective groom would have to pick out his sweetheart from among the veiled maidens!

Luckily for my brother, he was spared this particular test. And besides I am reliably informed that most brides dont want to share this moment with a whole bunch of wide-eyed maidens and risk her heart-throb pick the wrong woman!!!

SO my new sister-in-law danced in surrounded by her friends all singing and proclaiming her virtues and beauty for the whole world to hear. The veil shrouding her in mystery...

At this point, emotions run over and there are plenty of tears to go around. Especially as realization sets in that their daughter is actually going to start a brand new life with her husband.

The Groom's parents have the honor of unveiling the bride (or is it the groom?) and there are countless songs and dances that are performed at this stage!

Eventually, the bride's family rep performs the tying together ceremony which is kind of similar to what the priests in church do.

By this time, the guests are getting restless and invariably well-fed and just want to get on to the most interesting part of the whole day. At least according to some of them. The dancing part. After the forms have been met and the ceremony is done, there now comes much dancing and dancing and even more dancing and then some more dancing...

This dancing is the perfect culmination to the day as both sides having sat apart the whole day now come together and if the couple have chosen their colors properly, the whole venue is a wash of color and elegant outfits! Not to mention scintillating dance moves!

With this Ring I Thee Wed... Part I

Of course if you have lived in or being influenced by Western Culture, the title of this post should be very familiar to you.

It is the culmination of a process wherein

- boy meets girl,

- girl likes boy,

- boy runs scared that girl might actually like him enough to want to spend the rest of her life with him,

- girl convinces him this is not such a bad thing and

- boy suddenly finds he cannot live without girl,

- he puts a diamond ring on her finger to let other boys know she is no longer available and

- if parents, friends or a drop-dead gorgeous man-killer of a woman do not interfere,

- he eventually puts a wedding band on her finger in front of man, God and the church uttering the words above at some point...

Of course a lot of couples are dispensing with the last three steps above and just jumping straight to the next step of having children together and sharing everything from their bank accounts to the gym membership at the local spa.

But I digress...

Being from the Yoruba ethnic group of South western Nigeria and having being baptized as a Christian AND being influenced a whole lot by Western culture (all those American movies), deciding to spend the rest of your life with someone is a little bit more complicated than the process enumerated above!

At some point when you start meeting and dating members of the opposite sex, your parents start hinting that although a marriage is majorly about the two individuals, its also a lot about bringing two families together! Now since Nigeria is made up of at least 19 distinct different ethnic groups, with different languages, culture and history, you begin to read between the lines and get an idea of what your parents are alluding to!

Of course the younger generation (my generation) are a bit more cosmopolitan and global-minded and it doesnt raise eyebrows as much these days if as a Yoruba girl you marry an Ibo boy! Not too many eyebrows... well... a bit silly... but there you go!

Anyway... my big brother obviously took all those hints from my dad to heart and his bride is a nice Yoruba girl, who is also a Lawyer to boot! And since they are both Yoruba, we would be having an explosion of Yoruba culture and an excuse to party until we dropped!

First off... the wedding ideally takes place over 2-3 days. Like I said, since we are Christian, there was a fusion of the Western and the traditional. There are Yorubas who are muslim but no matter what religion, you are obliged to have the Engagement/Traditional ceremony.

The traditonal ceremony is a formal all day event that involves members of the groom's family coming with a huge delegation to ask for the hand of the girl in marriage. The bride's family of course is the 'host' and ideally should be seated when the groom's family arrives.

And when the groom's family arrives, it is no mere matter of strolling into the place. They are met by singers, drummers and praise singers. When we say that this is a day of joy and merriment, we mean it is a day of partying!
Now each family has a representative that handles all the 'negotiations' and ensures that all the forms are kept. The roles are usually taken by women and one could call them the custodians of tradition who ensure that everything is done according to laid down customs.

The picture on the left shows my parents at the far left (in green). The lady in the middle dressed in brown is the "Alaga-iduro" or groom's family rep.

Another interesting part of the whole thing are the outfits worn by each family. There is a color scheme, which in this case was Gold for the groom's family and Blue for the bride's family. Friends, family and associates of each family dress in head-ties and outfits that reflect the color.

There are smiles aplenty... afterall its not everyday you go to ask for the hand of a lovely damsel for your first son and heir!

And the charge is led by the parents of the groom who have place of honor at the head of the procession that will include friends, family members and loved ones.

There is an official letter written by the groom's family that is read by a young lady from the bride's family. The letter is on expensive paper and should be poetic as it is clear and direct. The damsel who reads the letter is usually the younger sister/cousin of the bride and she should read the letter in a clear, melodious and articulate tone.

The letter is wrapped in fancy paper and ribbons. Here you see my parents presenting it to the reps! (or "Alaga")

TO BE CONTINUED...

An acute case of Jet Lag...

And boy was it bad or what?

Wikipedia tells me that travelling west to east is supposedly worse and that you need one day of good rest for every time zone crossed.

Well I crossed 10 timezones (and lost a day to boot!) so I will be recovering for the next fortnight or so...

Why does New Zealand have to be so far...?

_____________________________________________________

And on an unrelated issue...

HOW YOUR MOUSE ARROW WORKS


This is true….
Very informative. Don't be put off by the Japanese writing, just wait for the picture to load.

Have you ever wondered how the small arrow on your PC monitor works when you move the mouse?
Through the aid of a magnifying lens the mechanism becomes easily understood. Click on the link below and when the image appears, slowly move your mouse over the light grey circle to see how mouse/cursor technology works.

http://www.1-click.jp/

According to Plan...

I will let the pictures do most of the talking here...


Traveling from New Zealand to Nigeria for 5 weeks to attend my brother's wedding; see Temitope; reunite with members of my family after an absence of two years was ALWAYS going to be a major project. Especially if you factor in my financial situation, health and peculiar circumstances.


Like any other project, it involved planning, forecasting, implementation, and review. Meticulous planning, robust and enthusiastic implementation and finally a nostalgic review has seen the project get a pronouncement of:



RESOUNDING SUCCESS!



An absolute fantastic, colorful, fun-filled and successful wedding ceremony




Being at my big brother's right hand (literally and figuratively) before, during and after the ceremony

Looking really 'fly' and debonair doing it too...

Possibly resolving one of the single most important decisions I might have to take as an individual. EVER! (more on this later...)

Spending time with Family... immediate and extended

...And with friends



...I absolutely loved the hanging out with friends part!

But here I am back in my room in my cosy little apartment in Auckland. Thousands and thousands of miles traveled halfway across the world, (and then back) loved ones seen again, good food, nostalgia, decisions made and confirmed... and I am very thankful!

Watch out for the narrative(s) and loads and loads more pictures from the trip...