I introduced Seun and Christine in a previous post and commented on how much adjustment you make when you commit to a relationship with someone else. Even if you are from the same provincial town and grew up as childhood friends, making the jump from single with no responsibility to shared destiny is difficult enough as it is. Never mind if the individuals happen to come from different countries and cultures!
This is the position in which my good friend Sean has found himself. On July 12, 2008 he made the commitment before God, Man and the Church to spend the rest of his days with the former Ms. Christine Cole of Auckland NZ. But if their wedding day was anything to go by, they have certainly made an auspicious start!
Seun arrived here in New Zealand some 6 years ago as an IT student and has fallen in love with the country so much he has even chosen one of the ‘locals’ as his life-mate. I had the singular honor of being his best-man on his wedding day. Seun and I went to High school together yonkers ago, lost touch and met up again when I arrived here 2 years ago. (has it been that long already?!)
The run up to his wedding was quite interesting. Because even here the difference in cultures created a few challenges. The basic premise is the same if you are a Nigerian Christian. The church service is conducted with a bridal train and dressed in western style clothing. The activity after the church service is where it diverges quite a bit. Western Style weddings usually have a cocktail for a large number of people where there is finger food, non-alcoholic drinks and a lot of small talk among guests. This is followed by a more formal meal or reception where the number of guests are smaller and is strictly by invitation.
A Nigerian wedding reception on the other hand is bit more… boisterous. You still hand out invitations and all but suffice to say… no one will be checking your invitation card at the door. And where one does not even get a formal invitation, a verbal one will suffice and gives you license to bring 2 or 3 friends along. I am imagining all the weddings I have attended in Nigeria and the word that comes to mind as a description is... Carnivale!
Seun arrived here in New Zealand some 6 years ago as an IT student and has fallen in love with the country so much he has even chosen one of the ‘locals’ as his life-mate. I had the singular honor of being his best-man on his wedding day. Seun and I went to High school together yonkers ago, lost touch and met up again when I arrived here 2 years ago. (has it been that long already?!)
The run up to his wedding was quite interesting. Because even here the difference in cultures created a few challenges. The basic premise is the same if you are a Nigerian Christian. The church service is conducted with a bridal train and dressed in western style clothing. The activity after the church service is where it diverges quite a bit. Western Style weddings usually have a cocktail for a large number of people where there is finger food, non-alcoholic drinks and a lot of small talk among guests. This is followed by a more formal meal or reception where the number of guests are smaller and is strictly by invitation.
A Nigerian wedding reception on the other hand is bit more… boisterous. You still hand out invitations and all but suffice to say… no one will be checking your invitation card at the door. And where one does not even get a formal invitation, a verbal one will suffice and gives you license to bring 2 or 3 friends along. I am imagining all the weddings I have attended in Nigeria and the word that comes to mind as a description is... Carnivale!
A wedding in Nigeria is an opportunity for singing, dancing and lots and lots of food. In a society obsessed with materialism, a wedding is also an opportunity to showcase how important you are in society. Especially with the political elite a lot of couples have to deal with their supposedly happiest day turning into a tool for their parents to court political favour…
But I digress…
Sean and Christine had to balance a lot of expectations. The small but boisterous Nigerian community in Auckland was all but ready to turn this into a carnival… which would have been, quite frankly a bit too much for some of Christine’s guests to bear! So they came to what I think was a wonderful compromise by having a quick lunch after the service for close family and friends (which still numbered about 60 guests) and then we had a much more relaxed and informal reception proper “Naija” style! Cue dancing, singing, lots to eat and yours truly as Master of Ceremonies. There were still the speeches in between the songs and dances but like I said it was a bit more informal and certainly more enjoyable. All the non-Nigerian guests certainly thought so too!
The couple also changed from the western style Tuxedo and Wedding Gown to traditional Yoruba clothes complete with ‘gele’ for the bride and ‘agbada’ for the groom. The danced in to the sonorous tunes from the vocal chords of a Nigerian student who plays the piano exquisitely and had been flown in from the South of the country specifically for the event. Seun’s big sister was the only member of his immediate family who was able to make it to the wedding and there were a few tears when she read a letter from the groom’s dad to the bride’s parents.
The catering was done by a Nigerian lady and although the menu read like a continental lunch menu, there was a decidedly African flavour to the food. And it must have been a good flavour as the food was devoured until the very last morsel!
The national Football team of Nigeria is known as the Super Eagles. The eagle is also a part of the Nigerian seal and coat of arms. New Zealanders however are known as Kiwis. The Kiwi ia a flightless bird that is near extinction and is local to these twin islands known as Aotearoa (Land of the Long White Cloud). The bride’s father welcomed Sean to the family officially during his speech and seeing as my friend also got NZ permanent residency recently, it seems he has seen fit to plant his roots squarely in this unspoiled natural beauty of a land.
As I said during MY toast to the couple, May all Seun’s and Christine’s joy be true joy and may all their pain be champagne! (It sounds much better when I say it)
PS
But I digress…
Sean and Christine had to balance a lot of expectations. The small but boisterous Nigerian community in Auckland was all but ready to turn this into a carnival… which would have been, quite frankly a bit too much for some of Christine’s guests to bear! So they came to what I think was a wonderful compromise by having a quick lunch after the service for close family and friends (which still numbered about 60 guests) and then we had a much more relaxed and informal reception proper “Naija” style! Cue dancing, singing, lots to eat and yours truly as Master of Ceremonies. There were still the speeches in between the songs and dances but like I said it was a bit more informal and certainly more enjoyable. All the non-Nigerian guests certainly thought so too!
The couple also changed from the western style Tuxedo and Wedding Gown to traditional Yoruba clothes complete with ‘gele’ for the bride and ‘agbada’ for the groom. The danced in to the sonorous tunes from the vocal chords of a Nigerian student who plays the piano exquisitely and had been flown in from the South of the country specifically for the event. Seun’s big sister was the only member of his immediate family who was able to make it to the wedding and there were a few tears when she read a letter from the groom’s dad to the bride’s parents.
The catering was done by a Nigerian lady and although the menu read like a continental lunch menu, there was a decidedly African flavour to the food. And it must have been a good flavour as the food was devoured until the very last morsel!
The national Football team of Nigeria is known as the Super Eagles. The eagle is also a part of the Nigerian seal and coat of arms. New Zealanders however are known as Kiwis. The Kiwi ia a flightless bird that is near extinction and is local to these twin islands known as Aotearoa (Land of the Long White Cloud). The bride’s father welcomed Sean to the family officially during his speech and seeing as my friend also got NZ permanent residency recently, it seems he has seen fit to plant his roots squarely in this unspoiled natural beauty of a land.
As I said during MY toast to the couple, May all Seun’s and Christine’s joy be true joy and may all their pain be champagne! (It sounds much better when I say it)
PS
I don’t have pictures of the wedding just yet but will upload them as soon I get them
2 comments:
hi seun what is ur email address.
david akinola
Same I am trying to contact Nigerians living near. Thanks
kindness63@yahoo.co.uk
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