The Driving Force

To control a man, you need to know what drives him.

Different things drive different men. The most successful individuals who have wielded considerable influence as the ‘power behind the throne’ knew exactly what their charges needed to succeed and provided it to them.

The best example of such a ‘power behind the throne’ would be Cleopatra. She seduced Julius Ceasar, then the most powerful man in the world and after he fell on the steps of the senate in Rome to assassins, Cleopatra turned her sights on his presumptive heir Mark Anthony and not only secured her kingdom but made Anthony turn his back on the business of ruling the empire he had acquired.

A bit of overkill there really on Cleopatra’s part.

For some people, romance is what drives them. Or more accurately, the theme of being a romantic. They dream elaborate dreams and imagine themselves as the central character in a happily ever after story. The majority of this kind of people end up bitterly disappointed as they (maybe) lack the pragmatism needed to make their dreams reality. This disappointment then becomes the driving force in their lives. So yes, one’s driving force may be positive or negative.

Positive - Love, (for your spouse, children, your own pleasures); Altruism; Ambition (to be President, the greatest golfer, to climb Mt Everest) etc.

Negative - Revenge; Bitterness (from a past incident or a love gone wrong) etc.

So yes, the things that drive a human being are varied in scope. The more positive your drive, the better it is. I think. And there is yet a third class of people apart from those with positive and negative drives.

Those with no drive at all.

If you have got no drive, you most likely have no values. You plod through life accepting of what it brings to you. You find it difficult to get excited about anything or anybody. You are wrapped in a timeless cocoon of inactivity and live a humdrum existence.

You go to school because your parents made you, not necessarily because you dreamed of becoming an astronaut or medical doctor. You get married because that’s what everyone else was doing or your spouse was attracted to your seeming ‘easy-going’ nature; not because you recognized the missing half of your own soul. You take care of your kids because well… that’s what parents do right? And not because you enjoy and take seriously the experience of moulding another human being’s values and entire persona from scratch.

He without drive is a very sad individual indeed.

And me what drives me? Still trying to figure it out to be honest. I can tell you what drives my beautiful Tope, she is a hopeless romantic even worse than I am. Happily Ever After is something to strive for. And while she accepts that it will not always be smooth sailing, this has not stopped her from projecting and working towards it all the same.

In previous posts, I have acknowledged that my interests and passion include: Family, Football, Good Governance and how to make a million dollars without stirring off your butt. But how does any of this translate into a clear articulate driving force for me?

I'll figure it out!

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It has been a month since Temitope arrived here in New Zealand and this period has coincided with an absence from this blog. Needless to say, it is NOT because of a lack of activity but because the last month has left no room to spare. The last month has been

- settling Tope in with the basics. Bank account; GP visit; etc.
- Putting documents together for immigration for a long term visa/permit
- Starting a company-sponsored course on Supply Chain management
- Exploring options for a Post-graduate diploma with the University of Auckland
- Basking in the glow of having a loved one to go home to at the end of every day

So yes it has been an interesting month for me. Obviously there is a whole lot more concerning Tope and I that I could fill a notebook with already. But I hesitate to publish these thoughts on this forum. When I publish my autobiography be rest assured that this heavenly period of my life will be captured in it.

And I can charge millions of readers a fee for the privilege of sharing it.