Last Day of the Year...

Yes I am still here...

I have been reminded that I am being rude (which I am)
That I have a novel to write (which I will)
That I still have international appeal (I really dont think so)
That I will always have local appeal (of course I will)

Last day of the year 2007... Spent the weekend in Taupo/Tapuki, which is south of Auckland and left work early. I am determined to groove into 2008. The Fireworks at the Sky Tower were impressive last year. Hope to see it again.

New Year Resolution? Stop losing interest in blogging...

Happy New Year Everyone!

SO many things going on...

My last post has a November 20 publish date but this was the day I started to compose it. I actually published it 2 days ago on December 4.

It happens to the most conscientious blogger.

So many things going on... so many thoughts and experiences to share; but it seems like there was never enough time to sit at a computer and write a post. Sometimes it seemed like the hardest thing to do.

But now I am back in the blog groove and hopefully I can summoun the motivation to sit and compose the posts.

FONTERRA CRUISE

Bonuses are paid to the employees at the end of the financial year (in June) but the company still manages to find a way to extend some Christmas cheer to the troops at this time of year. Last year it was a costume party where I went as Michael Jackson. This year it was a cruise around the Auckland harbour on a really nice boat.

I had made the observation that although Auckland is known as the "City of Sails" and there are any number of boats, Yatches and cruise boats anchored at the Viaduct harbour in downtown Auckland, I didnt know anybody personally who owned a boat! Perhaps I am moving in the wrong social circles. Hmmmmm...

Anyway, my department hired a cruise boat that had an open bar, on-board DJ and sumptous buffet fare and invited us all to a 4-hour cruise around the Auckland harbour.

And what a load of fun it turned out to be.

A piece of advice - make sure there are a couple of Latin Americans at any party you are throwing. The culture and passion of Latin America will ALWAYS out where 2 or more are gathered. They got the ball rolling with the dancing and when the boss of my boss ended up doing a very lewd dance with a pole on deck, I knew we had a real party on our hands.

Pictures say a thousand words.

I really have to dance more. It is such good clean exercise. And if you do it really well... you invariably draw the attention of the most beautiful girls in the group. Hyuk hyuk!! Guaranteed!

We got back to the harbour at about 5pm but most of us were so fired up that we decided to continue the party. And luckily, the Auckland Harbour has a bustling club strip built up around it collectively known as the Viaduct. We made our way (led by the Latin girls) to a bar called "Cowboys"

Again I will let the pics tell the story.

Please note that I was stone sober but was having enough fun that any inhibitions I had were very easily cast aside. (my friends might argue that I dont have that much in the first place)

It was very very nice to see my work colleagues let their hair down and have this kind of fun. Anybody who is willing to get up on a table and dance to Gloria Estefan's Conga cant be all that bad aye?!

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Welcome to World of Warcraft!

A massive role playing PC game. I first played this game in Sweden at a friend's house in the chilly northern city of Umea. I played it for 8 hours straight! I was disciplined enough that I didnt rush out and install it on AIESEC Sweden's computer and play myself into oblivion. (or to be honest... I couldnt afford it then :-)

You buy the box set which comes with a DVD and game manual book and then have to pay about $20 a month for subscription. When i was picking up my box set... the attendant warned me how addictive it was and I told him calmly that I knew how addictive. So now...

To my credit... I dont play it every spare moment that I have...There are breaks for the bathroom and to pick up the pizza from the delivery guy hahahahahaha! But seriously it is a really cool game that has 9 million active subscribers in the world.

And considering the fact that I get into trouble when I have too much free time on my hands. This is perfect for me. I am on Level 22 of a possible Level 70. Will keep you all posted.

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Not such a great author!

Laurell K Hamilton is not the author I thought she was. Please do not buy her books... or buy it if you are interested in literary porn.

Yep! You read right. Her Vampire Hunter novels deal with were-wolves; vampires; shape-shifter and arcane magic. And they revolve around the main character Anita Blake. Now I was conned into reading her because Marvel comics had made her first publication into a really really cool graphic novel (minus the porn) and I was so impressed that I rushed to get all the novels.

To be fair to her, the first (maybe) three novels were more in the pulp detective arena. Anita Blake was a vampire hunter and she had to solve crimes in modern day USA. But from the fourth book, the sex scenes got more graphic, which in itself is not a bad thing, but more and more such scenes were included that did ABSOLUTELY nothing to advance the plot of the novel.

She has been villified by her fans ( I am no longer one of them) and she did this interesting open letter to them basically asking if people didnt like it why were they still reading it. Good point. I gave up mid-way through Book 7! Of a 14 set series...

...Jim Butcher on the other hand is still going strong and has just released the fourth book of his Codex Alera series. Apparently, his Dresden files are a bit more popular and I really should look for those as well.

The joys of reading! I hope I can the same of writing very soon!

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Jose for England Job!

It is a prospect that sends thrills down my spine!

I have never been able to support the English national football team. They lacked a certain charisma as a unit, that even the presence of David Beckham failed to convey on to them. But because I support Chelsea football club of London, I am always sympathetic towards them. And I was really sad on their behalf when they failed to qualify for the European Championships next summer.

I usually pick a team (or two) to support at the beginning of any major football tournament from which Nigeria is absent. Case in point was the last World Cup. I was supporting Sweden until they were knocked out. I switched to France and was absolutely gutted when they lost to Italy.

A key determinant in which team to support as a neutral would be... personalities playing on the team. A Ruud Van Nistelroy would make me cheer for the Netherlands (as Ruud Gullit made me do a decade ago); A Zinedine Zidane on the French team made me want them to win so he could go out in a blaze of glory!

It was such personalities as the aforementioned Guullit, Gianfranco Zola and Marcel Desailly that attracted me to Chelsea in the first place.

And then came the Jose era.

The Special One brought a mix of over-powering personality and winning results that made me feel like I had lost someone when he left Chelsea a couple of months ago.

And now he bookmakers favorite to take over from Steve Maclaren as England coach. If that happened, England would be able to count me as one of their most ardent supporters. At least second after Nigeria and for as long as Jose was in charge!

Cross Cultural References

When two people decide to come together in holy matrimony (or a defacto relationship), they bring totally different backgrounds. Cultural and view-point wise. Compromise is the name of the game.

Blood brothers or siblings who come from the same genetic make-up and are raised with the same environment and exposed to the same influences are still sufficiently different enough that outsiders would never guess they were related.

How much more 2 people coming from different homes? From different cultures?!

A few weekends ago, I was part of an entourage of people that went to an Introduction ceremony in the west of Auckland. My closest friend in New Zealand (who is Nigerian) Seun Kehinde had gathered a group of us to go and formally meet his girlfriend's parents in their home. His girlfrend's name is Christine. And she is Kiwi.

In Yoruba culture, the introduction ceremony is perhaps the first part of the wedding ceremony. This is when the parents of the groom take an entourage of their immediate extended family (which might number more than 20 people) and go and meet the bride's family with gifts and songs. It is another excuse to dress up and have a huge party. Absolutely fantastic!

Seun had decided to give Christine's parents a feel of what it would be like back home. He and Christine set a date, he got about 6 of us his closest friends and we packaged two gift baskets complete with ribbons and we set out for her parent's place. They had also invited a couple of their friends to help in receiving us.

We had an agenda of events which was complete with prayers, songs and speeches. I had been a bit nervous that perhaps Christine's parents would find it a bit overwhelming with all the singing but apparently they absolutely loved it!

It was after the speeches and official ceremony when were enjoying a range of finger food, non-alcoholic wine and pleasant conversation that it hit me exactly how much of a committment it is to pledge yourself mind, body and soul to another individual. Christine and Sean were going to have to be even more understanding, tolerant and oh-so-frigging open minded practically the whole of their lives with each other!

I have seen countless examples of Nigerian men in Europe who woo and win over European brides and who have fairytale lives right up till the point when they go back home to visit the guy's family. The brides are astonished at the Jekyll and Hyde transformation in their men! They cannot fathom who the chauvinistic male pig is and cast around desperately for the man who won their hearts back home.

Which is why I thought it was an absolutely wonderful idea that Sean was willing to show a glimpse of the way things are done back home. I hope he does that in every aspect of his relationship with Christine. The above mentioned men above drop every aspect of their roots and culture and become more European (or kiwi; or American; or Canadian as the case may be) than the Europeans themselves.

I have caught myself doing this.

I am sometimes very anxious to prove my "internationalism" and broadmindedness that I play down certain aspects of my culture for fear that my audience might find it strange and different. Newsflash: it is ALWAYS going to be strange and different to someone who has never encountered it before. This does NOT make it bad, sub-standard or inferior.

Think of the distinguished German scientist who explains in accented English how he was able to break down the atom; or the sexy French waitress who asks in a sultry voice how you vould like ze milk in your covey(coffee); Kene my friend featured in a previous post told me how he would speak English in a heavily accented Igbo accent when he was being interviewed after winning the Nobel prize (he speaks flawless English)

Rather than sounding bad, hearing a foreign speaker speak your language can be so very exotic! And the exoticness(sic) extends so much beyond language!

So Sean and Christine, as you guys are taking these all important steps, may you find unique and wonderful things about yourselves and about your different cultures that will cement your union into a solid one!

No Seriously... Am I Fat?

This is the most recent picture of me. Its not that bad is it?

When I joined AIESEC so many years ago in my first year in University, I was immediately dubbed an "AIESEC Mascot". This was because of my stunning good looks, angelic features, a body to die for and a singular mastery of the English language...

...okay okay, it was because of my nerdy 'Joe-90' glasses, high pitched cackle of a laugh and because I was skinny and short. Not that this is your typical AIESECer of course!

But the skinny part is the one that concerns me.

No one would describe me as skinny now. Not by any stretch of the imagination. When I came out of the arrival hall in on my trip home in June, the first thing my friends said (in loud enough voices that everyone could hear) was that I was fat. "Have I gained a little weight?" I asked? "No you are fat!" they all chorused back at me. And then they hugged me and helped me with my lugagge.

I was having lunch last week in the office with my boss and he asked me if I was still on medication. I answered in the affirmative. "Aha! thats why you are putting on weight". I stared at him dumbfounded, as my spaghetti meatsauce with extra cheese suddenly didnt taste so good anymore.

I was chatting with a cousin of mine on MSN and she requested to see me through my webcam. "I thought New Zealand was a land of extreme sports and healthy living..." she exclaimed! "that part of the country pass you by? Gosh, you're fat!"

ENOUGH ALREADY!!!

Cedric the Entertainer is fat; Notorious B.I.G was fat; Tony Soprano is fat. I just happen to have a few extra pounds here and there. I still have skinny legs (my thighs seem a bit bigger. Just a little) and I still have skinny arms!

So what if I have trouble bending over to tie my shoes? What if my favorite pair of trousers seem a little bit snug? It is very unlikely that I am going to go back to the skinny kid of ten years ago. Very unlikely. So here's the deal. I will add some serious weight training to my gym routine and add Mount Eden to my daily walk regime.

So there!

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SHARING MY FRIENDS

Name: Muhammed Olumuyiwa Sanni

Time I have known him: 8 years

Location: Senior Marketing Manager (I think) Youth Dynamix Lagos, Nigeria

Memorable moment with him:

As Local Committe President of our respective AIESEC chapters, (him Uni of Lagos and I Uni of Ibadan) we were both major players in the national executive elections of AIESEC Nigeria in Jan 2001. We were both supporting the same candidate for National President and the mix of politics, passion and sharing the same views with someone you really like made it an AIESEC conference I will never forget.

Mo's handling of some divergent views of some members of his 'constituency' made me get up (mentally) and give him a standing ovation. Actually whenever I remember, I STILL get up and give him the standing ovation!

What I Like most about Him:

His unpretentiousness (is there such a word?) Egbon Mo as he is fondly known grew up in what we call "Isale Eko". The most apt parallel would be the Bronx in New York City. He is one of the most street smart individuals I know. He doesnt judge people and takes things in his stride. When you meet him, you instictively know that if you fall on his wrong side, he would rip your head off but if you find yourself on his good side, nothing and no one will be able to hurt you.

If that is not a contradiction of terms.

Other Comments:

The first time I met him was on a long distance bus on the way to an AIESEC conference. He was sitting with two beautiful girls and obviously charming the hell out of them. One of the girls had caught my eye and I walked down the aisle to them and promptly stole his thunder. The look in his eye told me I was so far down his bad side, it was only the presence of the damsels that was saving me.

We turned out to become best of friends and I was really really sorry I missed his wedding a couple of months ago. If I was there, I would have been the best man.

Disappointed in Meself

Two reasons:

First - I owe a friend money and I am way way overdue in paying it back. If you are reading this (you know yourself) my very next pay-check ok? Even before I pay the bills.

I start work at 12 noon everyday except Friday.

On fridays, instead of 12noon - 9pm, I work from 10am to 6am. The customers I service are in the Middle East so half of my time is spent liaising with NZ part of the Supply Chain and the other half with my customers Saudi, Syria and Dubai.

My office is about 20mins away (walking) and 2 mins away taking the bus. My mornings have traditionally being spent in bed or on the couch in front of the TV until about 11.30am.

I made a decision last week to make my mornings a bit more productive. A run/jog/trip to the gym first; French lessons after; work on the draft of my novel whilst chatting with friends in the northern hemisphere on MSN/Yahoo Msgr

I havent done any of those things except the chatting with friends on MSN/Yahoo Msgr.

You can take a measure of a man by how often he gets up in the morning to do something useful when he absolutely has no reason to.

If some wise person hasnt said the above already... well... now they have!

Although I look back at the 'working two jobs' period just earlier this year and shudder, it is a shudder tinged with personal satisfaction and pride. I think this instance is even harder. I knew I had to make it to my brother's wedding and needed the extra cash to do so. SO I stuck out the crazy hours and made it.

Now I just want to utilize my time better and achieve a couple of things that will make me look back with not a shudder but a smile and even more pride.

Early to bed tonight and early to rise tomorrow is gonna make Ladi healthy, wealthy and wise!

A Lifestyle Country...

A busy intersection in downtown Auckland

A Nigerian friend who has been here for six years told me the other day that New Zealand is a "Lifestyle Country".

"What the hell is that?" I wondered.

"well, they dont want you to work too hard", he explained, "Upskill yourself, get a good paying job and pay your taxes when due. If you get a second job, they take 40% of that additional income in taxes".

So apparently, dont kill yourself working too hard. Enjoy yourself.

Perhaps a bit of an over-simplification from my friend but New Zealand is certainly very "Work-Life balance" orientated. Auckland is similar to Stockholm in the fact that a 20min drive from the city will get you to the beach. Or to some stunning scenery a la Lord of the Rings. And apparently, the South Island (Auckland is on the North Island) is even more alluring and has more to offer in terms of outdoor activities.

I was down in the dumps for some strange reason on Friday and felt very very listless. I went out to a bar with some colleagues and had to leave early as I just couldnt bring myself to get in the TGIF spirit.

So on Saturday, I went to the barbers shop and got a haircut.... or more accurately, I cut off all my hair leaving a bald plate. (I look hot!) I had gotten the Anne Rice Novel, "Ramses the Damned" and made my way to Albert Park. Albert Park is situated right in the middle of the city center a half block away from my office building actually. As a true Lagosian, it always amazes when there is so much green in the middle of a city. Not just any city but the biggest city in the country. It was the same in Stockholm and people from outside the city always look at me funny when I comment on how much nature has been preserved amidst all the skyscrapers. Apparently, Auckland (and Stockholm too) has too much skyscraper and not enough nature.

Visit Lagos sometime I always tell them.

Anyway, it was a beautiful day with the sun shining, I made myself a sandwich and sat near the fountain in the middle of the park and proceeded to read my novel. The park bench I sat on at first wasnt comfortable enough after about 3 chapters so I moved to the luxuriant green grass lay down and continued reading. Of course I dozed off.

I woke up with a start when this adorable puppy started sniffing at the remains of my sandwich. After accepting the apologies of the handsome couple who owned him, I lay there and thought to myself, "Yep, this is not a bad Lifestyle to have at all".

I felt infinitely better so much so that I went home and did some cleaning. Hahaha

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Frank Lampard was back to his best in the game

Chelsea won with the biggest margin ever in our Premier League history when we gave Manchester City a footballing lesson with a 6-nil defeat at Stamford Bridge.


Needless to say, it is going to be an absolutely wonderful week! You just know it.

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Sharing My Friends

Labake dressed in traditional Hausa-Fulani garb during her National Youth Service





Name: Omolabake Mahassin Quadri


Time I have known her: 10 long wonderful years


Location: Milan, Italy


Memorable Moment with Her:
We had gone out partying all night in university. A group of us were supposed to go back to Labake's place to get some sleep until the morning. Labake's apartment was in a complex that had an external gate that was locked at 10pm every night. On getting to the gate, Labake informed us she had lost her keys. Six slightly drunk and very nervous people were forced to scale the 10-foot fence and jump into the complex to wait outside Labake's apartment door until morning when she could get extra keys from the Landlord or something. When the last person landed on the other side, Labake with a huge grin on her face pulled out her keys with a flourish and opened her apartment door.

She thought it would be much more fun to get in the way we did!


What I like most about her:
Her passion. Labake ALWAYS strives to out-do that most difficult of persons to please. Herself. Her motto in life is, "If I cannot find a way, I will make one". No matter what it takes, Labake will get it done. If you are looking for someone to have your back, call on her!


Other comments:
Labake and I were both born on Feb, 04. Which makes her my twin sister!

She and I were members of a great team on the local AIESEC board in university. A lot of people dont get her but I do. Completely! She can be very annoying a lot of times but then, so can I! I love her with a passion and would defend her to the ends of this earth and beyond!

Shit; Shower; Shave, Shag...

I knew a guy once who worked (on a team of six) with five girls.


In an odd twist of fate (or hormones or monthly cycles... whatever!) All five women were visited by the "curse of the woman" at the same time one month! My friend likened it to working in a china shop with five bulls who all had head colds!


Girls, women, ladies, females of the homo sapiens species the world over deal with the "blood curse" once every 28 days on average. For some its just a minor nuisance that has to be endured and for quite a large number, it is a harrowing 3-5 day experience complete with cramps, foul temper and incapacitation in some cases. I had one of my dearest friends (who is a girl) comment that you dont look forward to it, but if you happen to be sexually active and unmarried, the ceasing of your period equates to a DEFCON 1 emergency!


It was while resident in Sweden that a discussion about how lucky we guys were that we didnt have such an "affliction" that Nisarg (an Indian dude who worked with Electrolux) came up with the guy's version of the monthly period. The four "Shes"


Shit... Shower... Shave... Shag!


And rather than once monthly... we fellas have to do this four EVERY MORNING!!!


Well... perhaps only the first one is the ONLY sure one for all guys. But your macho, bull-throwing, hunk of a jock SHOULD be getting all four done in the morning right? Sadly not always!


Some guys think they can get away with not showering and this directly affects their ability to shag. Some guys shower but do not have enough in their genes to warrant shaving every morning. And other guys shit, shower and shave and even show-off but still cannot get a shag to save their lives. And seems like all some lucky bastards get to do is shag. At whatever time they want to!


The particular cross I am bearing right now is shaving. For some strange reason, my skin has always rejected ordinary shaving razors. I have always had to use an electric clipper to shave. And it seems I am unable to find a reasonably sharp enough electric clipper here in Auckland. And I have tried. But I just wasnt getting a close enough shave!


So I decided to try the new Gillette Fusion 5-in-one razor. It has a battery that makes it vibrate as you use and I thought maybe this would do the trick. How wrong I was! As usual, my skin did feel like a baby's bum right after using the damn razor! but now 3 days later, its like I have a skin infection! My skin is reacting so badly to the razor and the baby smoothness almost seems like a dream now. I persisted and shaved again the next morning and the morning after that. I heard somewhere that if you use a razor, you need to do it everyday. I wish I knew who told me that... so I could break their head. It's much worse.


So I have to go to the pharmacist now and ask if there is any special cream I can use for shaving irritation! I can at least do the first two "shes" unfailingly and always smell like a million dollars and not be so full of shit!
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Yipee! Another Author!

I harbour hopes of becoming an author.

Obviously, to write anything worth reading, you have to read a whole lot of other people who have written great stuff already!

I started reading Mills & Boons romance novels when I was in Primary 3 aged 8 years old. Any wonder I am a hopeless romantic?

I remember my mum had to drag me out for meals whenever I got my hand on a really good book. Enid Blyton kept me from becoming too weird as a reader of only romance novels at the age of eight. Famous Five, Secret Seven, and stories about fairies, golliwogs and elves.

Over the years, I have had various 'favorite' authors. Jefferey Archer, Harold Robbins and Jackie Collins with their best-sellers had my vote at some point. Danielle Steele's novels were too sad for her to rank in my top five at any time.

And then came Anne Rice with her Vampire Chronicles. After reading the Vampire Lestat, I wanted to sleep during the day and roam the night. I wanted to drink blood from evil-doers, cloud the minds of mere mortals and gain preternatural strength to bench-press a truck! I wanted to live forever!!!

Such was her power with the books.

I had read "Lord of the Rings" many years before the movie came to life and it is a testament to the art of Peter Jackson that the movies made me go back and re-read the book. My leanings turned from best-sellers a la Grisham, Clancy and Dean Kootnz to fantasy when I stumbled on Robert Jordan's Wheel of time! 12 books covering the same story and none able to be read on its own. It was in fantasy that my mind was able to travel beyond what I could previously imagine. And there were countless "trilogies" and six- sometimes seven - part fantasy novels in the market. But it is so hard to find one that will make you go to all the trouble of collecting all the parts and reading it. Very hard indeed.

Which is why for me, Jim Butcher's Codex Alera series is now one of my favorites. I am eagerly waiting for the next book to be published.

Of course we mustn't forget The Holy Grail otherwise known as the Harry Potter series.

And now I have found another author that has a whole series written (14 to be exact) and who I have taken the time to gather and read all the books in the series!

Please welcome Laurell K Hamilton to the list of authors with an approval rating of more than three stars (out of five) on Ladi's List of Authors. She is the author of the Anita Blake: Vampire Hunter series

I actually stumbled on her by accident as well. Marvel comics had done a collaboration and made one of the novels into a graphic novel. Since I gorge on graphic comics as a matter of course as well, I found Guilty Pleasures a visually stimulating, complex yet easy to follow dish of a graphic novel. And when they said it had been inspired by the actual novels well... case closed!

Anita Blake lives in a parallel universe where were-wolves, vampires and necromancy are the order of the day. Of course if this not your cup of tea...

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SHARING MY FRIENDS

Name: Amit Desai

Time I have known him: Two and half years (almost)

Location: 'some position' in UBS Switzerland

Memorable Moment with Him:

My 25th birthday, getting hopelessly drunk at the bar we were in and Amit making sure I got home in one piece! I remember everything from that night which is not such a good thing as I did some pretty interesting things the least of which was waking up the neigbours!

What I like most about him:

His drive and ambition to be the best in whatever he did. His was the standard according to which I worked towards in terms of my role as an Intl MC member in AIESEC in Sweden!

Other Comments:

My favorite Indian. An intense experience in Sweden was shared with this dude. When things were coming thick and fast, his was the base upon which to reflect, share and be amazed with. Experiences are meaningless unless they are shared. My wonderful Sverige experience turned this smart, lovable, spoilt, Baroda-raised Indian into my brother from another mother! Thanks for all the Skype and MSN offline messages you leave me bro. You more than anyone!

Personally Offended

I wrote a post just two weeks ago about racism. I was asking if it mattered that it could be overt or subtle. Most societies are not overtly racist anymore these days, although there is still a lot of subtle racism going on. Subtle racism, in my opinion could be said to be a product of the sub-conscious mind.

For instance a recruiter faced with 2 candidates of different races. He/She would not consciously throw one or the other application into the rubbish bin. The conscious mind knows to give them both a chance. The sub-conscious mind however makes a snap judgement on them both before even meeting them and in the interviews conducted, the recruiter is sub-consciously trying to re-enforce that snap judgement!

But I really should leave the philosophical stuff to people like Kene. (featured in my last post)

Well... a row erupted and reverberated around the world over the last 2 weeks. A Noble Prize winner James Watson, made comments that suggested that black people were genetically inferior to White people. This 'gentleman' won a noble prize for discovering the shape of the human DNA. Uh Oh!

Never one to take things out of context, I looked for the full story to see in what context he had made the statements he did. It didnt help. I then googled him and read about his previous work and controversies. It only made him worse.

Ladies and Gentlemen, we have on our hands a full blown bigot and racist who also happens to be a really smart guy and WAS very well respected!

His statements in an interview to a British newspaper while promoting his new book (who cares?) are thus:

"...(I am) inherently gloomy about the prospect of Africa" because "all our social policies are based on the fact that their intelligence is the same as ours - whereas all the testing says not really".

He was further quoted as saying that his hope was that everyone was equal but that "...people who have to deal with black employees find this is not true".

AAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHH!!!

I am obviously deeply and personally offended by these remarks.

It wouldn't be grating against my sense of outrage if it was some in-bred right-wing hack making these statements but coming from a world known scientist and not just any scientist but one that made an important breakthrough in human DNA...

He has since gone on to apologize for his words and said he didnt mean what he said. But me thinks he has been forced to do this by the world-wide public outrage that followed his remarks. He did not deny saying them and did not suggest that he was misquoted. He just did a flip-flop saying,

"...to all those who have drawn the inference from my words that Africa, as a continent, is somehow genetically inferior, I can only apologise unreservedly... that is not what I meant. More importantly from my point of view, there is no scientific basis for such a belief"

Too little, too late you misreable old coot!

He unwittingly made his true beliefs known during the interview, beliefs with no scientific basis. I applaud all the scientific institutions that have taken action. The Science Museum cancelled his speaking enagagement saying his views had gone beyond the point of acceptable debate. His lab in the US has since suspended him and the Bristol Festival of ideas in the UK also cancelled an appearance he was supposed to make.

This Watson apparently doesnt have a Sherlock Holmes to point out the elementary to him!

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SHARING MY FRIENDS...

Name: Ejiroghene Otiotio

Time I have known him: 9 years

Location:
MTN mobile communications Lagos, Nigeria

Memorable moment with him:
The first time I met him. I gave him a joke to read which had left countless other people before him helpless with laughter on the ground. Ejiro read the entire joke with a deadpan face and handed the paper back to me and said, "So...?!" I hated him on the spot!

What I like most about him:
His loyalty and reputation for saying it exactly as it is. I mean, EXACTLY as it is.

What I dont like about him:
His reputation for saying it exactly as it is. I mean, EXACTLY as it is.

Other comments:
Ejiro does not suffer fools gladly and he used to be one of the pure cholerics I ever had the misfortune to cross swords with. Some memorable fights and arguements with this dude. But he is also the sort of guy who would take you out for a drink right after he told you what a fuck-up you are. I missed his wedding in Dec 2006 but met his lovely wife in June 2007. I am waiting for the kids to arrive as I have been informed I am to be God-father to one of them! He is also one of the regular readers of this blog... so I hope this brings a smile to his face :-)

Ejiro with his lovely wife, Obehi

Where Are My Friends?

When I was moving here to New Zealand I was warned that one of the biggest challenges I would face would be that of isolation. Wikipedia describes one of the "uniqueness" of New Zealand as being its geographical isolation.


Boy were they right or what?

I found out exactly how right in my first few months here. I was used to having Africans as a large part of the immigrant population in my previous domiciles. Here in New Zealand, Africans are still quite few enough that it is almost an obligation to say hello if you bump into them on the high street. Although you are more likely to spot them from 500 metres away seeing as a dark skinned person stands out so much!

I have a lot of acquaintances in New Zealand and quite a number of friends already. The small Nigerian community is very tight and any excuse will do to have a get-together and gather everyone around. Music, food and speaking Yoruba or Pidgin English does wonders for your sense of community and homesickness.

But this post is about my friends. The ones in the Northern Hemisphere

I have been missing them a lot.

My MSN name and Facebook status asks where they are and I have gotten responses from quite a varied number of people (346 'friends' on Facebook and 225 contacts on MSN afterall). So this post is dedicated to all my true friends. Being who I am, I count quite a lot of people as friends so in the next few weeks, I will be sharing my friends with the whole world (such as it is) and why they are so special to me.

And perhaps... just perhaps... as I profile people here on my blog, consciences will be pricked and my phone will ring a bit more and my email box be a bit more that interesting to open up and read!

__________________________________________________________________

Name: Kenechukwu UMEASIEGBU


Time I have known him: 9 years

Location:
Global HR "something or the other" with Cadbury Schweppes, London United Kingdom

Most memorable moment with him:
Ask anybody who knows him and they will tell you that every single encounter with Kene is a memorable one. One of the most intelligent persons I know, Kene is a deep thinker who is very comfortable addressing a room of thousands or one-on-one with an indivdual. Whichever it is, he commands and gives you full attention until the end. (Switzerland, Festac, UNILAG, London)


What I Like Most about Him:
His conversation skills. It doesnt matter what you talk about, who initiated the conversation or how long you talk to him. Kene has an opinion about almost everything and he has never been shy or reticient in letting you know EXACTLY what he thinks. If you are having a dinner party, need a speaker for your annual conference or just want to unburden your heart... he is the man!


Other comments:
One of the people I look up to in a lot of things, Kene has been instrumental in shaping certain convictions I have. And certain questions I am still in the process of getting answers to have their root planted by Kene. (If you are reading this Kene, its not what you think! haha)

Kene is also the person most likely to ring me up (after my immediate family) just to say hello! (Which is why he gets the first post) And when he rings, its not in the middle of the night like most Northern hemisphere residents do but at a decent hour. New Zealand hour that is. I count myself very lucky to be Kene's friend and again dude, if you are reading this, I have not forgotten I still owe you 200 pounds!

Growing Up in New Zealand

"It's the economy stupid!"

Apart from coming through a life-threatening condition, seeing my immediate older brother get married in Lagos, Nigeria, and actually contemplating an actual date for when I take those vows in front of God, Man and the Church (yes... the church!); one thing has made me appreciate very clearly the fact that I am now an adult!

I pay taxes.

A bit of background here. In Nigeria where I grew up, taxation is not the hot-potatoe issue that politicians (or the military junta) have to deal with in order to win elections - or repress freedom of expression. (in the case of the military.) I do not have the exact statistics but Nigeria's economy is definitely more of an informal one. A greater percentage of the income earned by Nigerians is outside the "formal" framework of taxation and thus millions of workers do not pay income tax. And even those within the framework dodge the tax man with impunity and get away with it too. So how does the government get funds to fulfill its traditional role of public and social infrastructure provision??? 2 things:

It's not for nothing that Nigeria is the 6th largest producer of crude oil. And who says the government actually provides said infrastructure?

Thus when in the United States, a hugely popular "Gulf War" President lost his re-election bid to an upstart governor from Arkansas in 1992, the first sentence of this post entered the lexington of Political Economy. Outlining policy that involves increasing or lowering taxes in order to achieve some other social piece of engineering has always been a critical point in Western style democracies.

Nigeria was anything but, when I was growing up. My mum was a teacher in the state educational system and of course got taxed from source as a matter of course. As did people who worked with banks, civil service or any company registered with the Corporate Affairs Commission. But seeing as 80% of these people also had a thriving private enterprise of some sorts on the side (my mum certainly did) and they definitely did not pay tax, and perhaps double (or even more) of their number were completely 'hidden' in the informal economy, taxation simply was not an issue.

And when I lived in Sweden, I worked for AIESEC and got paid minimum wage (barely). I wasnt working to get paid in Sverige, I loved what I did and would have done it for free. (I did in Nigeria!) So although my wages as an AIESEC Vice President also got taxed, it was sufficiently low enough that I didnt care what a rise or decrease in taxes would do to it!

I have been in Aotearoa going on to 18 months working for the largest company in the land. And getting paid well above minimum wage. New Zealand is definitely a Western-Style democracy and income tax CANNOT be avoided. The saying, "the three certain things in life are death, change and taxes..." take on a whole new meaning for me. With so many things going on in the financial front for me, (hospital loan; planning for the future; buying a car) everytime I get my pay slip I scrutinize it carefully and see how much the government is taking from me.

Apparently they have taken too much in the last year

The Labour government in power (for the last 8 years) has declared an NZ$8.7 billion surplus. And this is after increasing spending in areas like health and education. The article in the NZ Herald goes on to say that Labour might use this as a bargaining chip in elections which are due sometime next year. "Vote for us because we have had a strong economy and we can afford to return some money back to you" or something to that effect.

There was a supplementary budget a few weeks ago and I remember the mood of one of my co-workers who is a mother of 4. It was distinctly unfriendly and cold towards the ruling government because she had been expecting an announcement of tax cuts. "They're not getting my vote in the next election, thats for sure" she muttered as she threw the paper down on the table in the coffee room.

I guess oil really has been a curse for my dear country. Rather than concentrating on increasing the productivity of it's people so it can get them to all contribute (via income tax) to social engineering and a better way of life, the black gold has made us overly dependent on it. A lot of lessons to be learned. A lot of ideas sprouting for the future. Clearer understanding and focused attention on the important things... but now I am babbling.

So even though I am not an enfranchised voter as yet in Kiwiland. I will be watching with keen interest what sort of tax cuts might come my way. Perhaps I'll finally be able to afford that diamond ring!

The Death of Jordan!

Robert Jordan is dead.

A whole lot of you will not have a clue who he was or what he was famous for. Any fantasy fan will however know and react with shock at the news. Any aspiring fantasy author will feel the loss particularly hard and it becomes doubly worse if you are a fan of his very popular 11-book Wheel Of Time Fantasy Series.

And the funny thing is that he died almost a month ago and I only just knew of it today. SO much for being a 'real' fan of his work.

James Oliver Rigney, Jr. (Robert Jordan was his pen name) was a collossus of the fantasy genre. Eight of his WoT eleven books made into onto the New York times best-seller list and one of the riders on the books was, "Jordan has come to dominate the world that Tolkien began to reveal..." or something to that effect.

Since 1990 when the first book in the WoT series was published, Jordan has been praised and villified in equal measure. I was one of those who thought that he had dragged out the story for too long trying to milk the rave reviews the series was getting. I had complained on this very blog that it seemed like he eventually lost the plot as Book 11 was to put it midly, "a lot of verbal diarrhoea..." Imagine an 800 page book covering the events of only one day!!! And advancing the whole plot by maybe... or actually barely advancing the plot at all!

And now he has gone and died on us. I am ashamed to admit that when he announced in 2006 that he had cardiac amyloidosis (an extremely rare disease), I sincerely thought it was part of the hype to try and ensure sales of the twelfth and final book would be high!

I have all 11 books in the series AND the prequel as well. And it has been announced that his wife who is also his editor and his publishers have enough notes and audio prompts to finish the twelfth book just the way Jordan would have wanted. Without him being there... Gosh!

Adieu, Mr Jordan. Perhaps someday when I get my page on wikipedia... it will be able to state that you were one of the big influences on my work.

"May you shelter in the palm of the Creator's hand, and may the last embrace of the mother welcome you home."

Racism: Overt or Subtle... does it really matter?!

I have never been the victim of overt racism.

In all my numerous travels and trips across Europe and now New Zealand, I have never been denied a service, barred from entering an establishment or called a racially degoratory term due to the color of my skin.

I have however been singled out for "random checks' at airport security, been asked how bad the 'war situation' is back home and even how I am finding it adjusting to life in New Zealand as a refugee! This from a complete stranger in an elevator!

But overt or subtle racism, does it matter which kind you are subjected to? Isnt one as bad as the other?

3 incidents occured in the past week that has made me ponder this fact.

The first was probably the most profound for me. I was watching Will Smith in an old re-run of the show Parkinson. It was shortly after Smith won an Oscar nomination for his role as Muhammed Ali and the host asked him what sort of relationship he had with "The Greatest" during filming. He proceeded to explain that Ali as a young man in 1960's USA lived with overt racism on a daily basis. Atlanta his hometwon was very much a part of the Segregated South. By law, black children were not allowed to go to the same school as white children, certain restaurants were off-limits and so on and so forth... that might as well have been a totally different world.

And it was.

Will Smith described himself as a "child of rap music and the 90's". If for instance you got busted illegally by a cop, you went straight to Internal Affairs and reported the cop. There was no such division as Internal Affairs in the US in the 1960's, apparently. Being a Nigerian, I have absolutely no clue what that would be like. To be denied... anything... based on the color of my skin. And to have to live with that on a daily basis.

Second, Damola Oyedele the Nigerian working in the AIESEC national office has had to cancel a trip back home to Nigeria. Why? He was refused a transit visa by the Australian embassy. Some of you might remember my post about being refused the same transit visa on my way to my brother's wedding in June. Said transit was for less than 2 hours and you dont even leave the airport but do they care..? Nope. Nationals of certain countries are just assumed to have an elaborate agenda to escape security and melt into the Australian populace and cause a meltdown of the economy. Or maybe even plan and execute an act of terrorism.

Since Damola was going for a specific family event, he has cancelled his trip but spent a wasted week in Auckland waiting for the refusal.

Third, I came across an article on the BBC website. The Australian government has decided to ban African refugees from seeking assylum in Australia. Now, on the face of it this seems like a well-thought out policy. Especially when you see the reasons outlined. There are hot-spots of violence (Iraq, Burma) that are closer than Darfur and Australia want to focus on the ones that matter strategically to the interests of Australia. Makes sense doesnt it? Why would you want to travel all the way from the African continent to the end of the world to seek assylum anyway? Let Europe and even neigbouring African countries take up the slack.

But then the article goes on to say that critics have labelled the move as a political gimmick by the John Howard-led government to win votes. Apparently certain parts of Australian society is quite suspectible to immigration xenophobia. A "nativistic streak" i think the article called it. So tell these segment of society that you are closing the borders and they give you their vote.

Scary and worrying.

Community leaders have come out to rubbish the claim by the government that current African immigrants are not integrating into society. The community leaders point out that these Africans are taking jobs Australians are not willing to do anymore. But anything to grab those crucial votes eh?

So although these days in the 21st century (when I started to travel and see the world) no one would dare refuse me entry just because of the color of my skin, does the fact that they use economic conditions in my country or even the neigbouring country's own as an excuse make it any better?

Most immigrants only want one thing. To create a better life for themselves. Granted, if any country took ALL the people that wanted to enter their territory it probably wouldnt work out that good for either the immigrants or the society.

But a lot of enlightened people know that developed countries DO need immigrants to ensure growth and productivity but there are always segments of society with that "nativistic streak" and the fact that they are large enough to woo with policies that pander to their xenophobic fears only makes it so sad.

I wonder what I will have to do to get an entry visa to Australia. Just to visit. Not sure if I want to go through the stress!

Let National Mourning... Commence...!

The All-Blacks of New Zealand have lost to France in the Quarter-Final of the Rugby Union World Cup.

This means that since the inagural competition hosted and won by New Zealand, this world cup is the least successful campaign for the All-Blacks!

In a previous post, I had predicted what a national disaster it would be if the All-Blacks failed to win the Rugby World Cup. For almost all previous world cups, the New Zealand Rugby Team is always ranked number 1 in the world prior to the World Cup but somehow always manage to lose the plot during the competition proper.

I havent actually been into town or spoken to any of my Rugby fanatic friends but an indication on my way to church was the constant thumbs-down sign the car in front of mine kept getting because he was still flying a little All-Blacks flag on his car!

I can certainlyrelate to their pain what with the drama of Chelsea in the past weeks. But I also cannot help but muse over what this will do to productivity in New Zealand over the next week. And I am not kidding. Perhaps New Zealand can take solace in the fact that their regional rival Australia also lost to England in the other quarter-final.

I guess, despite a lack-lustre start to the competition the Northern Hemisphere have made the winning plays when it really matters. I cannot wait to see the reactions of my Rugby-mad colleagues at work tomorrow.

Not More Important...BUT...!

Old Picture from Malta. Me with Nikki a die-hard Manure fan

'...football is more important than life and death to you' and I said 'Listen, it's more important than that'."


The often misquoted 'famous' saying by Bill Shankly, the popular Liverpool FC manager who started the winning streak of the great Liverpool side of the late 70's and early 80's. (A VERY LONG TIME AGO!)

Two posts ago... I struggled to put my feelings and misgivings about the Blue's poor performances in recent matches. Every time I thought about the fact that we hadnt scored in 4 premier league games, storm clouds seemed to gather over the skies of Auckland and I had to restrain myself from choking the life out of some random idiot who desperately needed it!

And when I allowed myself to remember that the "Special One" was no longer with us... well... lets just say the bumps on my head still hurt a lot!

I was disappointed to learn that ESPN wasnt going to screen the Valencia vs Chelsea game. Instead Liverlesspool and Marseille was scheduled. Since an 8pm start in Europe means 8am in Auckland... I decided to have a lie-in and catch the final scores and read the match report on the internet when I woke up.

I was very tired from the night before but couldnt stay asleep while the game was being played. So I hopped on the internet to catch the live-feed some 20mins into the game and my day went straight into the toilet as I saw Valencia was one goal up!

Grit your teeth and smile!

After a long shower and even longer breakfast that tasted like mulch in my mouth... I checked again and found the scores level! And then some 20mins more and Didier Drogba scored what would be the winner!

My day suddenly brightened. And I realized what a truly beautiful city Auckland is. The girl in the elevator going down was the second most beautiful girl I had ever seen. The bus driver was such a jovial and smiling fellow, the receptionist on the ground floor who always seemed so dour face looked like a fresh faced cherub. And the chinese guy in the cafe was shocked when I actually laughed at the same joke he ALWAYS told me whenever he saw me.

And all because Chelsea won a game many thousand miles away from me.

Football is NOT more important than Life. But said existence certainly seems much more rosier when your team is winning innit?

My good mood lasted the whole day and I swear I heard the "Halleluyah Chorus" reveberate around the building when I got round to checking the sports pages (dont tell my boss) and found that Liverlesspool had lost at Antfield!!!

Them with their mustachioed-rotating-loving-pot-bellied Spaniard who showed his lack of class when Jose took his leave of the Premiership. They went down to a Marseille team who is currently 17th in the French League. Ah there is justice in this world. I shouldnt obsess about another team but this team of pretenders have knocked us out of the CL twice in a row at the same semi-final stage. Wouldnt it be so cool to have them knocked out of the group stages? And that seems very likely.

But back to us! Next game is against Bolton. I will be dressed in my Drogba-inscribed Jersey and cheer the boys on!!!

Oh When the Blues...

Oh When the Blues...

Oh When the Blues Go marching In...

I want to beeee in that nuuuuuummmberrrrrr.

Oh When the Blues Go marching In!

Oh Yeah... Independence Day...

The Indian nation celebrated 60 years of independence from the British 'Raj' a couple of months ago. And it truly was a celebration. Although still racked by countless problems and challenges, the last decade and a half has seen a steady growth in the economy that has lifted millions into the newly established affluent class.

Indian companies are bidding for their counterparts all around the world. There is a mad scramble to invest in the Indian economy and take advantage of the huge numbers of newly developed middle-class professionals.

It has never been more hip to be Indian. IT knowledge, a well-informed outlook and a willingness to embrace modernity while still celebrating a rich and diverse culture have become hallmarks of being an Indian.

Their Independence from Britain was in 1947.

Nigeria my dear country celebrates 47 years of independence from Britain as well today. The numerals; the colonial power that let us go; the similarities end there.

Damola asked me what the plans were for celebrating Nigerian Independence. I was in the middle of a conversation and for a second, I hadnt the faintest idea what he was talking about. "Nothing" I replied, and went back to my conversation.

The time is almost 11pm and I just remembered that today was the day. Dont get me wrong. I love my country and have very strong roots there but it just seems like this Independence day shouldnt be about celebration but rather one of reflection. The government of the day is struggling with legitimacy claims after the farce of elections in April, millions live in poverty and mere months after inaguration, the parliament is reeling from a $5 million scandal already...

But let us not dwell on the negatives.

We achieved civilian to civilian transition for the first time in our history earlier this year. The current government seems serious about tackling corruption and although we still get bad press... there seems to be a feeling of anticipation and real hope among the masses of Nigeria.

Or am I just being delusional?

Ah Well... Happy Independence Day Nigeria. May we see and have more things to celebrate as a nation in the coming years.

PS
Again... the picture above has nothing to do with Nigeria's Independence. I just look damn good in it and thought I should post it :-)

A Metaphor for Life...

My original intent was to write a really deep and heartfelt post about how badly Chelsea Football Club is doing in the league...? Or rather how badly Chelsea is doing. Period.

I was going to liken the situation to the realities of life itself. A huge amount of fans from all around the world became 'fans' only when we won the Premier League for the first time in 50 years. (I am not one of them).

I do not need to go into the details of the current situation. Any half decent sports website will have covered the running saga. And all the drama going on seems to be having an effect where it matters the most to me.

On the Pitch.

We are in 7th place in the league and were only able to draw against Fulham. All the other 'top' clubs won their games. It goes to show the level of expectation and sense of winning that has been built into the club in the last 3 years that Ashes would have tasted better in my mouth after the draw with Fulham.

But now comes the important question. Do I stop watching Chelsea's games because they are in a temporary flux? Do I switch allegiance to (God Forbid!) Arsenal just because they are top of the table.

No I dont.

I grit my teeth and watch my team under-perform again and again. I smile in pain as my friends with their unfortunate alliances to Manure, Goners, and Liverless rub it in every week how things look bad for us. Because you see this is what being a football fan means. Having a rough patch (and trust me it is only temporary) makes you appreciate the winning all the more when it starts to happen once again.

Actually, this is what Life is all about.

You dont throw in the towel after just one defeat. After just one knockdown, No Sir you dont. You work your way through the sludge and come out on the other side with character and resolve.

Now I just need to figure out how to get through this week. Talking to Tope becomes imperative. I mean... talking to her everyday. She is my ray of blinding and warming sunshine in this football darkness right now!

Ah Yes! Champions League game on Wednesday. Away. To Valencia of Spain.

Grit Teeth. Smile in Pain. And you might be walking on air on Wednesday again.

Do You Qualify? Part II - A Brother's Response

IMPORTANT!!!

Please read the post before this one.

This is the direct response to that one!

The Brother's Response

You ask, do I qualify.

Can I fulfill your needs and become the man you need me to be?

My sister, are you prepared for what you've asked for?

Can you handle the responsibility?

Can you accept that, by GOD, I am the chosen?one,

the authority, the comforter, and the head?

Will you submit and willingly follow my path?

Or will you fight with me instead?

If I am your King, will you treat me as such?

Will I get the best of your beauty and poise?

Or will I be subjected to an appearance

neglected, and checked with some serious noise?

When I talk, will you listen? I mean whole heartedly and feel me?

Or will you rush me just to make your point too?

Can I be the man at all times? Even when it hurts?

Or is it just when it's convenient for you?

Can you love me for me, and not who you wish I could be?

Will you see the strong Black Man within?

Or will you always remind me of all

the past brothers behind me and make me pay for their sins?

If I don't send you flowers the day your co-worker received some,

will you know that I love you still?

Or will my good name be uttered along with those other doggish brothers?

Will you question if my commitment is real?

Will you be patient and teach me to understand you,

and allow my knowledge of your needs to grow?

Or will you shut me out when I ask, Baby what's wrong?

Or will you respond with, "Well a REAL man would know!"

When we first met, what was it that caught your eye?

Was it my mind, my heart, my personality?

Or was it my suit, or my job, or do you love

what I drive, instead of what's driving me?

Yes I can, and I will, make love to you from midnight to the dawning of the sun.

But, if I tell you I'm tired, will you trust

I'm sincere or believe that there must be another one?

My sister, I love you and my heart can be yours. No woman could lead me astray.

But like you, I have needs, so I beg of you, please, in this love thang meet me half way.

In life's tough times I'll hold you, in the rough times I'll mold you;

your simplest wish will be my command.

My life is yours if need be.

Yes you can fully bleed me, and when hell comes, in your place, I'll stand.

A good relationship is a powerful institution that must be built on a foundation of two.

So to answer your question,

YES sister, I do qualify.

Now, more importantly.....! Do you?!

Do You Qualify? A Woman's Poem!

My sister sent this poem to me on Wednesday January 28, 2004. I was trawling through my email inbox and found it again today. In light of the recent "momentous" events in my life (patience, patience... all in good time!), I thought it would be quite appropriate at this time to publish this poem on my blog.

I hope you enjoy it!

__________________________________________________

A Woman's Poem

Do you qualify to be the man I need you to be?

Will you be able to recognize the things you need to see?

Will you be able to understand, that I'm a good woman and in my life I need a good man?

Do you qualify?

Do you qualify to fertilize my unproduced seeds?

Can you fulfill, as I can, all of our needs?

Can you put me in my place if you see I am slippin?

Can you talk to me, wholeheartedly, not constantly trippin??

Do you qualify?

Do you qualify to be called all mine?

Can you leave the other women and temptations behind?

Can you come to me with your problems and not wait until it's too late?

Can you stand up and admit if you made a mistake?

Do you qualify?

Do you qualify to be the honest ebony man I would want you to be?

Would you be able to look me in my eyes and admit your feelings to me?

Could you take me in your arms and make love to me all night long?

Can you be sensitive and still be strong?

Do you qualify?

Do you qualify to be my friend as well as mylover?

Can you put our love before any other?

Can you cherish me as if I were Diamonds & Gold?

Can you make me feel like I'm the last woman you'll ever hold?

Do you qualify?

Do you qualify to be called a good man?

If I have doubts can you reassure me and understand?

Can your love intoxicate me as if I were High?

To be in my life, I need to know,

Do you qualify?

We Lost the Special One

Its true.



The man I have jokingly referred to as wanting to be like, when "I grow up" has left Chelsea Football Club!



The self-styled "Special One", who truly made my claims of Chelsea Football the best club in the world as true as they have ever been in our history has finally had enough of the interference, meddling and constant looking-over-shoulder from the owners of the club.



No not the fans, who I believe really "own" the club but the wealthy Russian Oligarch who had the financial muscle to match the dreams and aspirations of Jose Mourinho. No doubt, without the influx of hard cash we would probably still be an 'almost there' club in the English Premiership. But more than money can buy... the winning mentality and moulding of a conquer-all side was ALL Mourinho's doing.



And now we have lost him.



We didnt let him go... we lost him. And it puts a sinking feeling in my stomach.



Jose Mourinho, I do you no justice when I put the moniker of "self-styled" next to your description. No matter what happens after this. You are already one of the greats of the game and you can only better your previous achievements. Too bad those achievements will not be tied to those of Chelsea's



You really are the Special One!
(I dont feel like working today!)

Hard, Thick and Fast!

The title of this post sounds like a porn movie title doesn't it?

It has been two weeks since I last made a post on my blog and my loyal and caring readers (all half a dozen of them) have filled my inbox (not exactly) with queries and demands to update them with the latest going-ons in my life.

I heed their call and submit.

Something really momentous and life-changing HAS BEEN going on but I hesitate to put it down on this space for reasons I cant quite put into words... I had an interesting conversation with my little indian when I was about to start publishing this blog. He was of the opinion that a blog was an online diary where people shared their innermost and most personal feelings. I begged to differ then. Maintaining a blog for more than a year now has only served to reinforce my feelings on the subject.

Even if an individual sets out to consciously communicate his fears, hopes and dreams on something so open and easily accessed as a blog, his sub-conscious mind would still mould HOW he wrote his posts. If not WHAT he wrote. Many bloggers stick to a particular subject matter anyway and the few that proclaim to share their innermost thoughts are being a bit economical with the truth (thats euphemism for "bold-faced liar")

Now what point was I trying to make with all this...?

Ah Yes... so I WILL eventually share with the whole world (such as it is) the scope of the major happenings in my life but not quite yet. I will also leave the psychological dissertations to people like Brodie Boland. He does it infinitely better!

So WHAT has been going on with me that I can share now? Well... my last post reported laziness on my part and I did have one REALLY lazy weekend but the opposite is now the case as work is in full flow!

The New Zealand Dairy industry is right now in high season, the 4 million odd cows in the country have just calved and their udders are heavy and dripping with milk. This Milk has to be extracted (very humanely and with lots of eye-popping technology), collected, manufactured into cheese (Edam, Cheddar); milk powder (Whole, Skim and Butter); Milk Fat; Butter (salted and unsalted); Casein; and quite a few more dairy products, packed in cartons, bags and drums, shipped into containers and transported across the 140 country sales network.

Now since I sit right in the middle of this huge chain of getting the milk from "Cow-to-Customer" (with particular emphasis on the Middle East and Africa market), the emails have been coming in hard, thick and fast, my phone hardly ever stops ringing and my fax inbox seems to be full no matter how many times I clear it! Product planners, Factory managers, Sales Managers, Account Executives and Logistics planners are in high gear as we work on our constantly evolving (and world class) supply chain network and try to make our customers happy.

I Love My Job!

But it hasnt all been work work work. I finally managed to get my hands on a really cheap car. Which means I have the run of the whole of Auckland without having to rely on the not-so-convenient/reliable public transport system. Or on someone coming to pick me up to go to West Auckland. My social activities have largely been confined to the City Center but now with my Silver Mitsubishi Galant 1997 model (which has seen better days but at least still runs) I can expand my prowling activities to West, South and North Auckland. Check it out...

Dont be deceived by the shine. They apply special polish to make it look better. But like I said at least it runs!

Did I also mention that I played in a Fonterra football team against staff from MAERSK Shipping and TOLL Ltd? I didnt score or any goals but I did huff and puff (and huff and puff some more...) on the mixed team which won the cup eventually. I was supposed to play on the men's team as well but I picked up a knock in my left knee and couldnt continue. (and I was afraid my huffing and puffing might turn into a death wheeze!) First pic above is me in my snazzy jersey!

And here is a group picture of colleagues from work at the company Spring Ball!

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And speaking of football. Chelsea had to come from behind to level scores against Rosenborg of Norway in the UEFA Champions League Round 1 games. Rosenborg probably wouldnt be able to finish in the top half of the English Championship!!! So now in the last 3 games we have played, we have scored a measly 2 goals. This is very worrying. Granted Lampard and Drogba who combined to score about 50 goals last season are out injured but then what is all the prattle about "strength in depth" if other players cannot step up to the plate and take responsibility?

Dont get me wrong.... I think the boys played wonderfully. The Norwegian club was camped in their own half for most of the game and we must have had about 20 shots on and off goal but we need to start scoring goals if we are to move ahead this season.

Long term... the Champions League is sort of our holy grail. We want to win it. And yet I get the feeling that if we dont, the Russian might give Mourinho the boot! And to make it more interesting... if Mourinho does guide us to the ultimate prize in European football, i get the sneaky suspicion he will quit!

We can only wait and see!

Spring Ball Sneak Preview

I have been too damn lazy in the last week to write a post about the rollicking Fonterra Spring Ball which held about a week ago. Actually I have been to damn lazy to do anything else...

I thought I should at least share pictures from the night below.

I was dressed in my morning suit from my brother's wedding and was a bit worried that I might stand out in what was a black-tie event. Well I did stand out and in a very good way too.

One person commented that I happened to be the best dressed man she had been introduced to the whole evening. Hahahahahaha.

And Yes there were other males at the ball. None of my pictures with them seems to have made it into my collection though.

A Wonderful Wild Animal Story...

Make sure you read to the end!
I am almost over-whelmed with "heartwarming" stories through email, and I apologize for making you read this, but this one is truly interesting...



In 1986, Mike Matheson was on holiday in Kenya after graduating from Northwestern University.

On a hike through the bush, he came across a young bull elephant standing with one leg raised in the air. The elephant seemed distressed, so Mike approached it very carefully. He got down on one knee and when he inspected the elephant's foot he found a large piece of wood deeply embedded in it. As carefully and as gently as he could, Mike worked the wood out with his hunting knife, after which the elephant gingerly put down its foot. The elephant turned to face the man, and with a rather curious look on its face, stared at him for several tense moments. Mike stood frozen, thinking of nothing else but being trampled. Eventually the elephant trumpeted loudly, turned, and walked away.

Mike never forgot that elephant or the events of that day.

Twenty years later, Mike was walking through the Chicago Zoo with his teenage son, Tommy. As they approached the elephant enclosure, one of the creatures turned and walked over to near where Mike and Tommy were standing. The large bull elephant stared at Mike, lifted its front foot off the ground, and then put it down. The elephant did that several times then trumpeted loudly, all the while staring at the man. Remembering the encounter in 1986, Mike couldn't help wondering if this was the same elephant. Mike summoned up his courage, climbed over the railing and made his way into the enclosure. He walked right up to the elephant and stared back in wonder. The elephant trumpeted again, wrapped its trunk around one of Mik e's legs and slammed him against the railing, killing him instantly.

Probably wasn't the same elephant.